I'm not super tall, but I'm tallish. And I'm taller than the majority of my friends who come up to boob height when I'm wearing flats and practically to my belly button when I'm in heels. See... here is evidence.....
This is my 24th birthday, back when I was still 5'7.5". I'm using Danielle as a headrest because I'm so much taller than her.
I've always liked being tall. But now... I'm shrinking. For serious.
The last 2 times that I've been measured I've been five foot six and a half. That's a whole inch shorter. In 1 year I've shrunk 1 inch, which is totally scary.
If this keeps up then....
I'll be shorter than Danielle by the time I'm 29
I'll be officially a 'little person' by the time I'm 33 [is that even the correct terminology these days? I have no idea, but if I'm going to become one soon then I should probably find out... Also is that TLC show still on the air? About the 'little people'? I should watch that, to find out what life is going to be like for me]
I'll be under 4 feet when I hit 45
I'll be the same height as Barbie when I'm 75.
I know that people shrink as they get older, but this is ridiculous. Do you think that the government covers medical bills for people who shrink? Because I'm sure there are a whole host of health problems that pop up when your body changes at such an extreme rate.
Like how you get growing pains when you 13 and growing an inch a month, but in reverse.
On the plus side though, I've heard that the government does compensate you when your under 5 feet tall. I have no idea if its true, but it sure sounds like a good idea! And, at that height I could totally fit into kids clothes. I already fit into kids shoes, and they are way cheaper. If my clothes are cheaper, then I'll be able to buy even more clothes. Which is awesome.
And then once I get small enough I can wear this adorable dress that my friend made, but she only makes in kids sizes, which is totally age and size discrimination.....
And also Barbie totally has some cute outfits. This is the Heidi Klum Barbie and I think I could totally rock this.
Though I'm not really supposed to be the same size as her until I'm 75. Is this an appropriate outfit for a 75 year old? I would probably wear it even if its not.
Wow. Where to start.
ReplyDeleteYes, you do get compensated by the government if you're under 5 feet tall.
But, I believe you have to have a medical condition which causes you to be short. Not just be short. It's considered a disability. So yep, t-minus 20 years until you're official disabled.
Second, at 5'7", how do you possibly wear kids shoes? Perhaps your body has really just taken 25 years to realize "hey, we mis-calculated and made our feet too small" and instead of just making your feet grow (which seems like it would be rather impossible), you're shrinking.
To summarize, sorry you're disabled but at least you get to buy multi packs of clothes for under $20.
Jhou.
Well I certainly hope I don't have that problem. I'm starting out at 5'5!
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PS: That Barbie looks like it belongs on Austin Powers.
it sounds like you have some osteoperosis and got a compression fracture in your spine, which causes you to shrink...if you're eighty years old of course.
ReplyDelete-caitlin (Duh)
I look forward to the day when I tower over you ba ha ha ha
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