I have been made the Responsible Safety Officer of my company. Yep, that's right, me. Not only do I barely have any idea what my company does (despite working there for over 2 years... What the hell is an OC3 Ring anyways?!?) I am also a total klutz! I will probably have to fill out more incident reports to hand into myself than any other person in the company! Responsible Safety Officer my ass... more like Responsible 'I Don't Know What the Hell I Am Doing So Stop Looking At Me Like I Should Have The Answers' Officer.
And not only have I been given this amazing new job, but our safety program is a giant mess and I get to clean it up, all before we have an audit in June. Its going to be fun. Frak me. Ok enough complaining about my job... Here is the plus side.... I am getting to take lots of nifty classes that will look awesome on my resume! Things like 'Accident and Incident Reporting and Investigation' 'Hazard Assessment' 'H2S Alive' and most importantly the class I spent the last 2 days in 'Safety Program Development'
The exciting thing about 'Safety Program Development' actually has nothing to do with the class. Its exciting because one of the people in said class works for a company called... wait for it... FRAC RITE!!! Best. Name. Ever. It combines Battlestar Galactica references with double-entendre!! And is obviously a company I want to work for. Too bad they only have 6 employees, are not hiring, and from the conversation I had with the employee of Frac Rite, they don't actually even watch Battlestar Galactica, which actually makes them an Epic Failure in my books. Seriously, with a name like that watching BSG should be a standard part of the training program.
For those of you out there that don't understand what Frac has to do with BSG, I recommend that you start watching A LOT more space television.
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You should get a job with Frac Rite, driving a Frac truck. Then you could say you're driving the frac truck to frac rite. But then so that people that DO watch BSG will get it, you have to say Frac is spelled with a K after.
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